Read the short story The Elevator. After reading the story I want you to rewrite the ending. Start with the last sentence of the story (Hello, Martin," she said and laughed and pushed the Stop button.). Add 4-6 sentences to end the story. Don't forget to respond to at least 1 or more other posts. Post your ending and response by 10 pm.
Wednesday, August 22, 2012
The Elevator
Class,
Read the short story The Elevator. After reading the story I want you to rewrite the ending. Start with the last sentence of the story (Hello, Martin," she said and laughed and pushed the Stop button.). Add 4-6 sentences to end the story. Don't forget to respond to at least 1 or more other posts. Post your ending and response by 10 pm.
Read the short story The Elevator. After reading the story I want you to rewrite the ending. Start with the last sentence of the story (Hello, Martin," she said and laughed and pushed the Stop button.). Add 4-6 sentences to end the story. Don't forget to respond to at least 1 or more other posts. Post your ending and response by 10 pm.
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"Hello Martin," she said, and laughed, and pushed Stop button. He tried to stand up for himself but the lady was up against him hurting his leg and he couldn't talk. She was staring at him like he wanted to eat him. Now he was terrified! The 1 minute it took to get out felt like 1 hour for him and when they got out, he let out a sigh of relief. His dad came back and Martin asked him if he saw the lady and he said no. Martin's dad said it was probably just his imagination. That night Martin had a dream that he was in a hot dog bun about to get eaten by that same fat lady and woke up instantly, sweating and crying. When he looked up, his dad was with the lady who had a evil smile and said "This is the new resident son, present yourself."
ReplyDeleteThat was a cool ending! It kept me on the edge!
DeleteThat was really a good ending I really enjoyed it a lot.
DeleteCool ending I didn't expect that.
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Delete"Hello, Martin," she said, and laughed, and pushed the Stop button. He knew this was the end, when suddenly he reached out for the Alarm button. A loud bell was ringing and the lady was scared. " What did you do!" she yelled. The lady grabbed Martin and started to crush him. Martin was running out of breath when out of nowhere fire fighters opened the door who were responding to the alarm. They saw the woman crushing the boy and saved him. The lady was taken away. Later that night when Martin was in the hospital, the nurse was looking over his charts when he realized, it was the old, fat lady...
ReplyDeleteThat was a creepy ending, I wouldn't want to wake up to a old, fat lady staring at me. It was a good ending after all.
Delete"Hello, Martin," she said, and laughed, and pushed the Stop button. The fat lady picked Martin up with one hand then started to suffocate him against her stomach. Martin panicked and was running out of breath until he managed to escape. But he was still trapped between the the fat lady and was being suffocated again. Martin yelled, "Help! Release me!" Martin bit the fat lady's stomach but was no use since she didn't feel it. It was until then, that he heard the elevator stop and th door opened. Martin's father saw what the fat lady was doing and tried helping him. Martin's father somehow removed the fat lady off his son but it was to late...Martin was...dead.
ReplyDeleteWow sad ending! but it was intense Good job.
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ReplyDelete"Hello, Martin," she said and laughed and pushed the Stop button. Martin was drowning in sweat when his eyes met the Lady's eyes. He started fighting her,hitting her with his crutches aimed at her face. Blood started to pour from her face yet she still manages to grab Martin's crutches.She was about to hit Martin back,when suddenly the elevator door opened and it was Martin's dad who came back to take him home. He got closer to the Lady and started punching her everywhere.When he was about to jump on the lady,*poof* she disappeared! He fell hard on the floor but he managed to get back to his feet and walked towards his son to gave him a tight hug! The END!!!
ReplyDeleteWow, you have such a violent ending Gineli ...
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Delete"Hello Martin" she said and laughed and Pushed the red button. Martin then started to really sweat because he couldn't think of nothing else to do so then he just went to the corner and started to cry. The fat lady got so angry at Martin because she really liked Martin a lot but the type of guy that she liked was a guy that didn't cry so she then pushed the red button to leave the elevator. When she got out she just bye you cry baby and she never bothered Martin again.
ReplyDeleteI like the quick ending.
Delete"Hello, Martin," she said and laughed and pushed the Stop button. Her voice was something Martin did not expect at all. It was very deep and manly, and she laughed like a mad man. Martin's mind was racing with thoughts while the crazy man lady was laughing like a menace. He came to the conclusion that she had to be an evil spirit in the building, and it had been watching him since he moved in. He threw his crutches at her, and fell to the floor to get as small as possible, as she was trying to grab him. He shut his eyes, and threw his hands over his head as protection just as he heard someone breaking into the elevator shaft. Outside were police, who were puzzled with the stopped elevator shaft only containing a little boy. This demon lady had disappeared when the doors were being pried open. Martin told the police everything, though they thought he was just a lying kid. When he got home, his father embraced him, thinking he had been kidnapped by this "fat lady" his son mentioned before. They moved out because his father was afraid for his son's safety. Martin never heard or seen this evil spirit again, though he now gets a feeling he's being watched by something even more evil.
ReplyDeleteI like the twist you put into your story. It's a lot different from the others. Good job.
DeleteI like how his father was actually nice to him in your part of the story. Creepy ending though!
Delete"Hello, Martin," she said, and laughed, and pushed the Stop button. The fat lady saw that Martin was now completely defenseless and she took advantage of her opportunity. She wanted to hurt Martin. The fat lady started to push up against Martin with all her weight. Martin was out of breath but he wasn't going to let the fat lady hurt him. Martin pushed her away with his last bit of energy and she feel to the floor, he then went out of the elevator as quick as possible and found his dad. Martin told his father the story but when they asked the apartment manager about the lady he said that there wasn't a lady, that fit their description, that lived in any of the apartments.
ReplyDeleteI like how you say they asked about the "fat lady", and how the apartment manager says there is no one that fits the description! It gives it a really creepy feeling.
Delete*fell
Delete"Hello, Martin," she said and laughed, and pushed the stop button. "Who are you, and what do you want from me!?" Martin yelled. The fat lady stayed silent and just did the normal thing she used to do and stare at Martin. Her laugh echoed through the whole building. The elevator had suddenly stopped, and the lights started to flicker. It became dark... "Martin, Martin!!" It was his dad. Martin forced his eyes to open even though it was really bright. He was on the floor of his room. His father had explained to him that he had fallen and hit his head. Everything he went through was just a hallucination.
ReplyDeleteI like the way you ended it by having his dad making him feel better by telling him it was a hallucination. Its makes the story feel a bit less dark and suspenseful but it was still a good ending.
DeleteGood job i love you
Delete"Hello, Martin," she said and laughed, and pushed the red stop button. As soon as she pressed the button the lights flickered on end off and on the last flick she vanished and Martin had a big relief. He pressed the seventeenth flour button and the elevator dropped straight to the bottom of the complex. Martin unconscious for twelve hours woke up and opened the escape latch and tried to climb but his brittle bones could not lift his weight up so he closed his eyes. When Martin opened his eyes the fat lady was standing in the dark side of the elevator as the light dimes out the fat lady whispered "Martin", "Martin get closer I will protect you." martin screamed as loud as he could but he soon was beaten by the fat lady. Soon Help came and he was rush to the hospital. Martin was going threw slow recover when saw his dad came to visit him. His dad said everything was going to be OK." Quickly his dad pulled off the oxygen tub and said "don't look at me its for the best." Martin gasping for air tried to say help but his voice died out and his dad the rushed out of the hospital and was never seen again.
ReplyDeleteThe ending is pretty sad but overall i really like it Goodjob!
Delete"Hello, Martin," she said and laughed, and pushed the stop button. Martin trembled with fear but some how he managed to gather up all the courage he'd never had to scream, "What the hell do you want from me?!, I'm sure i won't make a good meal! I'm all bones no meat!" keeping his eyes closed and red like a tomato. Her grin grew larger to the sound of Martin's panic tone and said "Don't worry you little Q-tip, I'm vegetarian." Martin opened his eyes and gave her a small confused look as he said "who are you?"
ReplyDeleteThe fat Lady stretched her arms out reaching towards Martin and said "Come to ma'ma boy" as she embrace him in a hug and whispered to his ear "I'm your mom, my little twig." Martin unable to breath, not because of the shock, but because he was being suffocated by her blubbery body,stayed quite and listen to her snorting laughter...
Hello, Martin," she said and laughed and pushed the Stop button. The fat lady stares at him and laughs as Martin keeps pressing the button for floor 12. Martin goes away on his crutches and attempts to go up the stairs up to his home on the 17th floor. After 20 minutes of struggling to get up the stairs, he finally makes it to the 17th floor but he can hear a laugh near his room, and he hears "Martin needs to grow up". Martin approaches his room and sees his dad talking the fat lady, and his dad says "Martin, It's about time you got here, I hired her to test if you would be stupid enough to run away even with that hurt leg of yours." The lady laughs and snarls as usual and hugs his dad and leaves without introducing herself leaving Martin even more shocked than before.
ReplyDeleteThat was a good ending good job.
Delete"Hello, Martin," she said, and laughed, and pushed the stop button. Martin was scared and wanted to get out but she wouldn't let him. She grabbed him by the neck and started to strangle him. He thought he was going to die but somehow managed to escape. He then pressed the emergency button and the doors opened. He got away and tried to explain what had happened but his dad didn't believe and told him to grow up and to stop making stories up.
ReplyDelete"Helo, Martin," she said and laughed, and pushed the stop button. Then the fat lady said "I heard you are a little wimp." Martin full of fear said "What do you want from me you old fat lady?" and the fat lady got so mad and said "Im gonna help you get out of your miserable life!" and jumped towards him with her mouth open as if she was going to eat him but Martin got the courage to hit her as hard as he could with one of his crutches with a force so great it knocked the fat lady out which was bad for him to because she landed on top of him. When Martin woke up he was at his room. He then ask his dad what happen and his dad said "You got knocked out by the elevator door when you tried to come with me to visit Terry Ullman."
ReplyDelete"Hello, Martin," she said, and laughed, and pushed the Stop bottom. Martin was terrified of her. She throw his crutches to the ground and pinned him against the wall hard. The elevator moved and began falling. "You will pay for what your mother did to me" the fat lady said with hatred in her eyes. She didn't care that she would have to die. The elevator hit the ground and throw Martin up and hit the ceiling breaking his neck.
ReplyDeleteHello, Martin," she said and laughed, and pushed the stop button. Martin stood their in panic. Too many thoughts had crossed his mind... How did she know my name? Why had she spoken until now? The fat lady laughed even harder and said "why are you scared of me"? "i have done no harm to you".Martin burst out saying, "you are a freak"!! He then pushed her out the way with all his strength. He managed to get out and turned back and told her. "Leave me alone, your just my imagination"!
ReplyDelete"Hello, Martin," she said with a chuckle and pushed the stop button. I was so scared to see what this woman wanted from me.
ReplyDelete"I see you every morning and afternoon that I can't help but notice how much you look alike to my son," she said in a sorrow tone," he is now been dead for about 2 years."
I was startled and scared at what the lady had just told me. My heart was thumping rapidly, my palms were sweaty, and my throat was dry and horse. Just the thought of me looking like someone who had been deceased frightened me. I stood there motionless. When I had finaly gotten the courage to respond to her, I had said,"Is that why you stared at me with those piercing eyes of yours?"
"Yes," she responded back,"but it wasn't my intention to scare you. I simply wanted to see if you had his same color eyes."
she started crying, her round face covered in tears. I felt a sudden urge to hug her, everything i had felt before vanished in a couple of seconds. I couldn't have imagined how heartbroken it must have felt to loose your child. As she was telling me this I couldn't stop my mind from wondering why my mother had to die so young,i never got to see her face. I decided to hug her because it seemed like that's what she needed at the time.
"Thank you," she said in a whisper,"I really needed that hug of yours."
"Your welcome," I responded, as I pushed the stop button again so it may continue to go up.
When the elevator finally got to the 17th floor, I hugged her again and again she thanked me. Ever since that day, we kept conversating every morning and afternoon. Day by day she became a motherly figure, and I became some what of a son to her.
Hello, Martin," she said and laughed, and pushed the stop button.Martin was scared he didn’t know what to do. The fat lady took a step closer to him. He had nowhere to go but to run across the elevator. He yelled “get away”! The fat lady said “wait, hold on”. “Do you know who I am”? Martin shook his head no. she simply sighed as if his answer was a big disappointment. In which it was. Martin then said “who are you”? “I am your mother” the fat lady replied. He looked into her eyes with complete shock Martin said in the most upsetting voice “you’re not my mother”! Thinking in his head how would someone try to claim to be his mother when she had passed away, when he was little? Under her breath she mumbled “I knew this would happen”. She kept talking to where martin can hear her now “I never died I left because of your dad but never because of you, when I had saw your dad at the hospital I knew you were actually who I thought, my son and I’m sorry for hurting you by leaving”. Martin’s eyes begin to tear up. He started remembering a box that he found full of pictures, he had remember one that had him, his dad, and a lady that looked exactly liked the fat lady. Martin squeezed the fat lady and said “I thought about you every night of my life, mom”.
ReplyDeleteoof
ReplyDeletewho am i?
ReplyDeletenobody knows
but im still here
watch out
ReplyDelete